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He will need strong letters of recommendation to round out his application. David is responding to the prompt on the Common Transfer Application: "Please provide a statement (250 words minimum) that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve, and attach it to your application before submission." Let's break down the discussion of David's transfer essay into several categories.The strongest feature of David's essay is the focus.David is attempting to transfer into an Ivy League school.
David needs to approach this effort at transfer realistically — even with excellent grades and a stellar essay, his chances of success are by no means guaranteed.
That said, he has many things going for him — he is coming from an equally demanding college where he has earned good grades, and he seems like the type of student who will certainly succeed at Penn.
The kibbutz at Kfar Ha Nassi was one such environment, and the urban environment of Philadelphia would be another.
As my transcript shows, I have done well at Amherst and I am convinced I can meet the academic challenges of Penn.
Many transfer applicants are trying to move to a new college because they are running away from some kind of bad experience, sometimes something academic, sometimes something more personal. He does have a lot more space left to elaborate, but in this case the letter gets the job done well with few words.
David, however, clearly likes Amherst and is running towards something—an opportunity at Penn that better matches his newly discovered professional goals. The Common Transfer Application instructions state that the essay needs to be at least 250 words. David gets the tone perfect, something that is difficult to do in a transfer essay.
David is attempting to transfer from Amherst College to the University of Pennsylvania.
As far as admissions standards go, this is a lateral move—both schools are extremely selective.
I originally applied to Amherst because it was comfortable—I come from a small town in Wisconsin, and Amherst felt like home.
I'm now looking forward to pushing myself to experience places that aren't quite so familiar.